Friday, November 15, 2013

Keeping It Neutral!


Happy Friday everyone! It has suddenly turned from winter to spring here in this small town! +10 the last 2 days and more spring-like weather on the weekend! Welcome to Canada...

There’s a lot of questions people ask you when you are pregnant but by far the most popular is, “Do you know what you are having?”

It’s very common now for couples to find out the sex of their baby prior to delivery. And I see why people would want to know! It’s exciting to find out that gender of your baby so that you can focus on names, nursery colors and imagining life with a little boy or girl. But, there are still a few people that like the surprise and we are one of those couples.

When Ryan and I use to talk about having kids he was adamant on the fact that he would want to find out the sex of the baby. He explained that he just didn’t like the idea of a surprise and having to wait that long to find out. It was definitely something we didn’t agree on but went along our daily lives.

Then the day happened when it became a reality…we were going to be parents. We were going to be asked a lot in the coming weeks if we wanted to know the sex of the baby. We had to come to an agreement.

Thinking I had a big argument in front of me I planned out all of my rebuttal points but when I asked him if he still wanted to find out the sex of the baby he said, “no, not really. It really doesn’t matter”.   

I was shocked but very happy that we had come to an agreement so easily. I just love the idea of after all this time of carrying the baby and then through the marathon called labour, that the doctor finally says, ”It’s a…”. It’s like all the hard work had come down to that moment. That I might be able to give it just a little more effort in order to FINALLY know if we have a son or daughter.

I have loved to watch people’s reaction when they find out we are not going to find out the gender. There are some people that look at you like you are crazy and then there are the ones who are pleased about the surprise. I am also enjoying hearing what people’s guesses are and what their theory is. The things that people believe in are hilarious and no at all scientifically proven but I love to hear them all. 

I know that I am suppose to have this “mother’s instinct” as to what I am having. Truthfully though, I don’t know. I could probably come out with a far fetched guess with what I am feeling it is but that is all it would be. And, I am keeping that guess to myself. I don’t want to make the wrong prediction for fear of looking like I wanted one gender over the other. So for now, I am keeping everyone else’s predictions locked up in my brain for future reference. To see who’s wives tales were correct and which were not.

As of right now, Ryan and I hope to have at least another child. We will not find out the sex of any future children either. Being that we will not know the sex of the first baby everything we plan will be gender neutral. The nursery, clothes and other baby supplies will be good for either a boy or a girl. This will really come in handy with the next baby as everything will be ready even if they are of opposite sex.

My brother now has 3 children. We did not know the sex of any of those babies. Being that we work and live so close to one another I always knew when it was “time” and the baby would be arriving. As excited as I would be for the actual birth, what I was REALLY looking forward to was that phone call that would announce, “It’s a boy or girl”. It was like Christmas morning waiting for that moment!

Now I have my own “Christmas morning” feeling as the days get closer to d-day! I love this feeling of surprise and anticipation as we wait for Baby W. At times I talk to the baby saying, “Who are you little one? Mommy’s little girl or little boy?”

Now it’s your turn, tell me…If you don’t have a baby, would you find out the gender? And if you do (or are about to) did you find out or will you? And why or why not? What are your thoughts!



  1. I still think you're nuts. But I respect your decision. Haha

  2. You know I'm all in favour of the surprise - I'm sure it's not an easy decision to make, and when/if the day comes for me, maybe I'd feel differently, but I'm pretty sure I wouldn't find out. Of course a baby's arrival is exciting regardless, but getting the news - the big "IT'S A..." reveal - makes it that much more fun! I can't wait to find out if my boy prediction is accurate! ;)

  3. I need to find out - i want to be prepared and in all honesty, I don't like green and all changes anyways especially when you have a girl - yea you can put green and yellow on boys but the minute its a girl, the pinks start coming in and thats what you want her to wear. But to each their own, I NEEDED to know!!

  4. I wish that I would not have found out, but I'm still happy that we know we are having a little girl. I think with the next one though we won't find out, I made sure to register for most of our big items in gender neutral colors so they can be reused for another child in the future.

  5. I'm all for the surprise! It gives you that little extra push at the end of labour when you want to quit. If you are still seeing Dr.T he will tell you that when you give birth he likes to be the one to say what it is. He was happy to find out we didn't know the sex. He said he is excited to tell the parents what it is, and then they say yeah we already know. But when we had Willow he was working so hard at getting her to start breathing that he didn't say. It was Chad who whispered it's a girl, and I will never forget that!

  6. I used to be on the I HAVE TO KNOW spectrum, but now I'm on the fence leaning towards not finding out.

    My reasons are...
    1) Less clothing, more practical gifts. I am particular about clothing, and as soon as people know they just go nuts with the gender-specific clothing, that I generally hate.
    2) Reusable stuff. I have a friend that just had a baby and EVERYTHING is pink. The tub, the activity play centre, everything! If they have a boy, they'll have a bunch of pink stuff or they'll have to re-purchase
    3) Surprises - the surprise part is the part I'm least interested in, although that moment would obviously be amazing

    My reasons for wanting to know is that I am a huge planner and horribly impatient. I think we'd either wait and find out until after the showers with a gender-reveal shower, or keep it between us for the other stuff. But I am horrible at keeping my own secrets, so that might not be possible

  7. We aren't finding out either!! (Where in Canada do you live? I'm sure I've asked you before)
    I was secretly hoping the baby would "show" us, but the baby crossed its legs as we scrolled down to the feet! I wasn't allowed to ask, as upon M and I's agreement. I go back and for daily, sometimes hourly with what I think it could be! Haha. I just wanted M to have that big moment of announcing the sex, I feel like that excitement is a once in a lifetime moment, especially since we don't know that we get to have anymore children.

  8. I don't want to find out either which is surprising because I hate surprises, but for some reason I don't want to know. Maybe that will change when I am actually pregnant and have the chance to find out though! :)

  9. I didn't want to know and my ex-husband did, so he found out and kept it secret from everyone. Just before she arrived, he went shopping and bought Syd a pink leaving the hospital outfit. Our boy name was Harrison so he always referred to the baby as Sydney Harrison/Harrison Sydney. When Syd was born it was a big kerfuffle with her being a preemie but the Dr clearly said 'Congrats, you have a daughter.' She was whisked away to the NICU with her Dad and when I asked another Dr how she was doing, he said in very broken english 'He's fine, he's breathing on his own'... It was a long 4 hours in recovery waiting to know if I had had a girl or boy ;). That being said, I'm all about the surprise for the first!